POLYGAMY – IT IS THE LAW OF ALLAH AZZA WA JAL – NO ARGUMENT CAN DILUTE IT

WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT!

Complaining against Polygamy, a Sister laments:

“As salamualaykum

I had read the article published today with regards to a brother writing about polygamy. The matter is indeed huge. And can break many homes. ( part of the reason why there are so many divorcees )

To begain with I do not know how the brother comes to the conclusion that there are a shortage of men in the community? (The Hadith has predicted this scenario. The ration will still be 50 to 1 – The Majlis)

Secondly What is the reason there are so many divorcees and spinsters?

It is because majority of the men in our community do not know the basic sunnah on treating women. Just one wife! The women in our communities go thru untold sabar due to these beasts of men who have no respect or shame. Their eyes and hearts roam to every woman it can. And they do not know basic kindness to the wife.

They then come with guise of worry for other single women and the sunnah of taking a second wife. Are they in actual fact using the sunnah as an excuse to fulfill they carnal desires? (Fulfilling carnal desires in a halaal manner is 100% permissible –The Majlis)

In almost every home there are abused women. (These are homes in which there is only one wife – The Majlis)

There are so many spinsters because most girls are so scared to get married. (Incorrect! Most spinsters cannot find proper husbands – The Majlis)

It is absolutely necessary that before talking about polygamy in our communities. The men should be taught to adopt the sunnah of controlling they gaze. The evil of watching porn. How to control their anger. And to teach their female folk and themselves haya . Unless they do not do this first, polygamy will not help but cause more harm. (The same logic applies to monogamy which will also ‘cause much harm’ in terms of this logic. – The Majlis)

The brother encouraging this sunnah of going ahead in this major responsibility and sunnah of taking a second wife is perhaps unaware or did not think through the current situation in our communities. Polygamy at the moment will undoubtedly be the cause of a huge increase in more divorcees and spinsters at the moment. It will only cause more heartbreak and fitnah in the name of the sunnah.”

(End of the Sister’s lament)

COMMENT AND ADVICE

Since the Sister’s letter is a portrayal of the emotions and attitude of most women, it is best we offer some advice. This issue is a matter of Imaan and Kufr. Without applying their minds, women allow their emotions to gain the upper hand. Then in the process they lose their Imaan. Woman being naaqisul aql (deficient in intelligence) never means that they are bereft of intelligence nor does it justify defective application of their Aql.

The arguments proffered by the Sister against Polygamy, the Law of Allah Azza Wa Jal, are spurious. The hasad factor is palpably manifest and is dominant in the tirade against a Practice ordained by Allah Ta’ala and upheld and implemented by Rasulullah (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam), the Sahaabah and the entire Ummah down the long 14 century corridor of Islam’s history.

It is only the kufr culture of the West in which the females are today groomed and cultured that has spawned in them such an aversion for this Law of Allah Ta’ala that their Imaan is either endangered or effaced. It is nothing but the western cult in which Muslims are today schooled which has bred kufr in the hearts and which is presented with nafsaani cunning in a manner to accord rationality to the aversion stemming from its base of kufr in the nafs.

Regarding Polygamy, the Sister says: “The matter is huge and can break many homes (part of the reason why there are so many divorces).” Every person, male and female, who views this statement without nafsaani emotion will understand its spuriousness, in fact, total invalidity.

We deal with innumerable marital cases and so do the plethora of other Muslim bodies. While we have first-hand knowledge of divorces, the Sister may have a smattering of information. The vast majority of divorces is the consequence, not of the husband having taken a second wife, but the following issues:

Husband’s injustice to his wife
Wife’s injustice to her husband
Husband being a scoundrel
Wife being a scoundrel
Husband not fulfilling the rights of his wife
Wife not fulfilling the rights of her husband
Rubbish in-laws
Lack of Deen – lack of Taqwa.
Gross disobedience to the Shariah which brings in its wake the Wrath of Allah Ta’ala which eliminates barkat from the marriage.
Husband’s income insufficient to satisfy the inordinate demands of his wife.
Husband’s reluctance to spend adequately on his wife and family despite having the means.
Intemperate disposition of the husband
Intemperate disposition of the wife.
, etc., etc.

But in 99% of divorce cases, the cause is not the husband taking a second wife. Polygamy in our community due to the kufr western civilization Muslims have adopted, is rare. Thus, the Sister’s argument in this regard is baseless and unintelligent.

The Sister says: “To begin with I do not know how the brother comes to the conclusion that there is a shortage of men in the community.”

Whether the brother’s conclusion is factual or baseless, is not the issue. Shortage of men and a glut of women is not the primary reason for the permissibility to take more than one wife. While the abundance of females and shortage of men is a reason which the apologists proffer to justify polygamy and to make it sound more rational for western brains, it is in reality a non-issue for men who take second, third and fourth wives.

Allah Ta’ala has created men with a polygamous disposition. The Sister says in her letter: “Are they in actual fact using the sunnah as an excuse to fulfil their carnal desires.” No, they are not using the Sunnah as justification. They are marrying the second wife for the very reasons that men marry first wives. Almost 100% of people, both men and women, marry to fulfil their carnal instincts, and not to fulfil the Sunnah. They eat food, not to fulfil the Sunnah. They sleep, not to fulfil the Sunnah. They do all these acts to fulfil the natural dictates of the nafs created in them by Allah Ta’ala. As long as they fulfil their carnal desires within the bounds of the Shariah, they are not blameworthy and no one has any entitlement to castigate anyone who acts within the framework of the Shariah.

Only those whose brains are dim and dumb believe that people marry to fulfil the Sunnah whether it be the first or second or third or fourth marriage. Even the first marriage is for achieving fulfilment of carnal desires. The other factors attendant to marriage are of either secondary or of no importance when getting married. It is only after the novelty of the marriage has dimmed or evaporated that the other factors surface.

The Sister correctly says:

“What is the reason there are so many divorcees and spinsters?” It is because majority of men in our community do not know the basic sunnah of treating women…”

This is 100% correct. But it also applies in reverse gear. That is, the majority of women are also ignorant of the basic Sunnah requisites pertaining to treatment by wives of their husbands. It is worse if the wife happens to be a madrasah product, a so-called ‘aalimah’. On the basis of what the Sister has conceded, namely, the majority of divorces is the consequence of the beastly attitudes of men, it follows that these divorces are not the consequences of second wives. Almost all divorces are those of monogamous marriages. The homes where women are abused by their husbands, are homes in which there is only one wife, not two.

The Sister says:

“It is absolutely necessary that before talking about polygamy in our communities, the men should be taught to adopt the sunnah of controlling their gaze – the evil of watching porn – how to control anger….Unless they do not do this first, polygamy will not help but cause more harm.” (Our emphasis)

The statement emphasised by us is in fact kufr which the Sister does not realize. She desires to stipulate such conditions for polygamy which Allah Ta’ala has not. Furthermore, she has acquitted herself without brain-application. If these conditions (guarding the eyes, etc.) have to be predicated to polygamy, then there is no rational reason for not applying the same logic to monogamy.

In the same way as suggested by the Sister, should a man who will be taking his first wife be taught these issues. Only after he has polished his nafs and have accomplished the goals set by the Sister, should a man take a first wife.

The averment that “polygamy will cause more harm” if the man is not a Wali, is palpably baseless. The harm of divorce is in 99% of the cases the fault of the first wife. Her ignorance of the Shariah, her extremely deficient Imaan and her intellectual deficiency are aggravated with the ingredient of nafsaani hasad (jealousy). This hasad is natural. There is no blame for this attitude. But to give vent to the dictates of hasad is abominable and haraam.

It is the first wife, in almost all cases, who breaks up the marriage. She is prepared to ruin her dunya and her Aakhirat – she is prepared to see her children going to the dogs for the sake of satisfying the lust of her hasad. But Allah Ta’ala will reward with Shahaadat (Martyrdom) the wife who suppresses her hasad, resigns herself to the decree of Allah Ta’ala and with Sabr passes the remaining few days of her life.

It is grossly unjust to blame the second wife (that is in 99%) of the polygamous marriages for the marriage of the first wife ending in divorce. The divorce is the direct consequence of the intolerance and hasad of the first wife and her rejection of the Command of Allah Ta’ala.

In almost all cases of polygamy, the second wife is prepared to sacrifice some of her rights for the sake of peace. She abandons her right of equality of nights and financial expenses and accepts that for the sake of peace and harmony her husband may spend more time and more money on his first wife and children.

Then the Sister says: “Polygamy at the moment will undoubtedly be the cause of a huge increase in more divorces….it will cause more heartbreak and fitnah in the name of the Sunnah.”

This understanding is the effect of blind emotion, the ultimate consequence of which is kufr. The Sister should apply her mind to understand what actually she has unintelligently disgorged. What will increase the divorces? Who will be the cause of the heartbreak and fitnah? Undoubtedly, it will be only the first wife who will blindly destroy her marriage and life with her storms of hasad while the second wife will be far away sitting in silence.

It is always the first wife who breaks up the marriage, not the second one. In fact, most first wives are so cruel and unjust that they throw down the gauntlet. They demand that the husband must divorce the second wife. The miserable man who lacks proper brains and courage succumbs to the inordinate haraam demands of his first wife, and divorces his second wife causing the Arsh of Allah Azza Wa Jal to shudder. May Allah Ta’ala guide our Sisters and save their Imaan.

27 Muharram 1445 – 15 August 2023